Chapter Text
Guilt wrecked Cyrus’s mind. Strong feelings – feelings in general even – his distaste was endlessly apparent as he stewed within his thoughts. Saturn had attempted to deliver and update on a mission yet stopped dead in his tracks when he caught a glance of his boss’s expression. Cyrus wanted to scoff. How foolish. He could not deny that it was for the best. His plans would only sink his mood further. Everything was progressing well. He should have been content – proud even.
It felt like a punch directly to his gut. Your mortified expression… Your harsh words. The idea of a world without spirit, you had simply despised it. Feelings… He hated them, especially when they overwhelmed you. Your tears were staining the folds of his brain as you told him that existing in a world where you could not love him sounded far too hellish. He felt shame. Love… He struggled with it, yet he could not deny that he was swayed by it.
He was being swayed by it currently.
His laptop was closed. His tablet was left off to the side. He paced back and forth. Why? Why did you always have this powerful effect on him? Part of him wanted to yell at himself for height so illogical, while the other felt ready to throw away everything to make your tears stop. Leaving him… Your harsh words about leaving him haunted his mind as much as your tears. You threatened to head home, gather your things and just vanish. Cyrus’s hand clenched at the leg of his uniform. Losing you… His ideal world was at the precipice of existing, but losing you.
He swallowed his pride.
No.
Losing you was absolutely not an option.
He alerted Saturn that he was taking off for the day and departed from the building. His feet carried him mindlessly back home. When was the last time he had come home? He could not recall. So much time had been spent focusing solely on his plans. You must have felt unimportant to him, too. Cyrus was not a fool. He knew well enough that losing you would ruin everything. You had been a sole comfort in this world that only wished to mock him. Through his worst moments, you had been at his side. Whenever his trauma crept into his mind, you grasped him firmly and pulled him back to reality.
He was shocked to see that you were genuinely beginning to pack things when he opened the door. His blood felt like ice. He felt as if he was floating away. You seemed shocked to see him, likely believing his words of feigned apathy. He regretted them. Why had he said them? You just stared at him, unspeaking. Within seconds, his arms were around you. His eyes were wide. When was the last time he felt this panicked? He did not want to recall that period of his life.
You stayed still for a moment longer, then let out a sigh. Your arms came around him. Only then did he feel relief. A gentle hand rubbed his back. He tried to force down the shaky breaths that had only grown more accelerated. Your voice called his name. Reality felt so far away. He needed you. Part of him hated this, yet he knew better than to reject it. Your presence alone provided a sense of peace that no where else could he find. Cyrus held you tighter to himself. He felt like a pitiful child grasping desperately at a mother’s skirt. The harsh pang of feeling that the visceral image drew out made everything worse.
“Please,” the beg that left him was foreign to his usual demeanour, “Don’t go.”
You reassured him that you would not leave.
His eyes met yours, distant and uncertain. Lips pressed to your own. He lost himself in you for a moment. His forehead rested on yours while you softly held his cheek. You said one simple request.
“Stop your plans.”
Cyrus felt far too weak to deny you.
His new world… He could not tell if he desired you or it more. But, this current situation pointed to you.
“For you,” was his reply. Lips pressed against your own again, silencing you.
Whether it truly was the end or not… It was impossible to tell.
For now, it was.
All he wanted was for your warm embrace and presence to surround him. You seemed more than willing to give him just that.
